June 10, 2005

Matt 101: An introduction to the Matts
by docsmartypants

After some recent confusion among my friends about which Matt was posting on my blog (Pavik), I thought it might be a good idea to give you all a crash course on the many and varied Matts of the Doc Smartypants world. Don’t worry, you won’t be tested on this.

Matt the Hobbit

1 2 3 4 5

Matt Fields

aka: Chef Matt, Matt the Hobbit, Mattymoo

How I met him: Matt came into CC&G while I worked

there and I recruited him to play cards with Larry. Later we worked there together and amused the ladies of Regis Hair Salon by doing the “mall dance” to the Ramones.

Currently living in: Bellingham, Wash. (with Perrycuda)

How to tell him from the others: He’s the shortest; likes to cook; fancies boys.

I once saw: him wrap his entire hand in cellophane and tape so he could shower (to protect his stitched-up thumb, which he almost cut off while cooking).

Quote: “Oh my gawd, it’s like butta’!”

Perrycuda

1 2 3 4

Matt Perry

aka: Perry, Perrycuda

How I met him: Perry knew Fields from Port Townsend and they lived next door to each other when they first moved to Bellingham.

Currently living in: Bellingham, Wash. (with Mattymoo)

How to tell him from the others: Single and looking for a lady; likes a spankin’; plays online games.

I once saw: Larry break a boat oar over his ass.

Quote: “You bastard!

Matt of the Broken Monkey Glass

1 2

Matt Pavik

aka: Matt of the Broken Monkey Glass, Matttty, Kinko’s Matt

How I met him: Worked at Kinko’s in Boston with Larry. While he was on an out-of-town trip we were at his place to feed his fish and I broke his monkey glass. The gravity was much stronger in his kitchen than on the rest of the planet.

How to tell him from the others: Lives in Oregon; in a long-term relationship; is the only Matt so far to post a comment on my blog (as “Mattttty”).

Currently living in: Portland, Ore. (with Librarianna of the Broken Monkey Glass)

I once saw: him sing “YMCA” at a karaoke bar.

Quote: “It was wicked pissa’.”

posted under Miscellaneous
12 Comments to

“Matt 101: An introduction to the Matts”

  1. On June 11th, 2005 at 1:51 pm Librarianna Says:

    I think Pavik and Perry should be each other for Halloween!

  2. On June 11th, 2005 at 1:57 pm The BBG (big bald guy) Says:

    God, I love the matts, er except the third one because i dont know him.

  3. On June 11th, 2005 at 3:31 pm docsmartypants Says:

    To know him is to love him. So go ahead and love ’em all!

  4. On June 12th, 2005 at 7:56 am Perry Says:

    For the record, I don’t play Evercrack, I have much better taste in my online gaming addictions! Heh.

  5. On June 12th, 2005 at 9:49 am docsmartypants Says:

    Perry: OK, fixed that. Larry said you did. Blame him.

  6. On June 12th, 2005 at 10:09 am Larry Says:

    And for the record, I told DocSmartypants that you like those MMORPG (Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Games) like EverQuest.

  7. On June 12th, 2005 at 6:25 pm docsmartypants Says:

    And I said, “He plays EverQuest? You’re sure?” And he replied that yes, you did.

  8. On June 13th, 2005 at 7:27 am debbie Says:

    I’m glad you cleared that up for me, since I know them so well (ha ha). Seriously, “perrycuda” looks exactly like a friend of mine named Guy. He was from Chattanooga and whenever we said his name we had to say “Guy Sparks from Chattanooga, Tennessee”. Anyway, talk to you soon.
    Debbie

  9. On June 13th, 2005 at 2:30 pm H-Bob Says:

    Hee hee… Very nicely done… There will be no mixing them up again! Also, is “Debbie” Debbie?

  10. On June 14th, 2005 at 5:50 am docsmartypants Says:

    H-Bob, Debbie is indeed “Debbie” and based on her post I’m beginning to think there may be some vast Matt cloning conspiracy being funded by the government.

    I also really like Librarianna’s idea about Pavik and Perry being each other for Halloween! Priceless!!!

  11. On June 14th, 2005 at 10:50 am H-Bob Says:

    Pavik looks almost EXACTLY like a friend of mine named Kevin… Matt cloning is happening, I tell you!

  12. On June 14th, 2005 at 10:53 am H-Bob Says:

    Yeah… Debbie posted a couple of comments on my LJ… It’s so great to hear from her again! She’s alive!!

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